Here is the list of things that I dislike/hate. (in no particular order)
1. Spiders
2. People who act stupid because they think that it is cute.
3. Winter/cold weather (except at Christmastime)
4. Those couples in high school (and I've encountered a few in college) that walk super slow while stretching out their holding hands across the ENTIRE hallway when all you are trying to do is get to class.
5. Fighting/war
6. Ferrets (I wouldn't really say that I hate them, they just really creep me out)
7. Beef stew
8. Roller coasters/any kind of extreme theme park ride
9. When super political/super religious people (from any/all political affiliations/religions) force their beliefs by harassing everyone else and have no respect for the beliefs of those different than them.
10. South Park and how it is responsible for the popular "kick a ginger day". That whole show has got to go, says the kicked ginger.
11. When people who have known me for years still mispronounce my name. At first, I don't mind if you call me Alisha, it's totally cool. But if you have known me for a year or more, I expect for my name to pronounced correctly. it is pronounced A-lee-sha dang it!
12. Did I mention spiders?
This is charming. I especially like the (intentional?) contrast of 5/6. War to ferrets is a great juxtaposition and actually allows you to undercut any self-seriousness that might be emerging. Like you say in 9, you don't necessarily appreciate preachiness, so it seems like you're careful not to be preachy in 5/6.
ReplyDeleteWhat's wrong with Beef Stew. I love Beef Stew. F. Just kidding, of course.
Do you see how these lists could become something more. For instance, you might begin a list and, when you get to 10, you admit to your reader that what you're really interested in is telling the story of your hair color.
Or you start a list and when you get to 4, you just can't help talking about a specific couple--Devon and Devin--who used to do this hand-holding thing even though Devon knew you liked Devin and she was supposed to be your best friend and PDA is disgusting especially when Devin wears those jeans which are super-cute and you know Devon only likes him to make Darren jealous and all of this is happening on the day you found out your grandma is too sick to come for thanksgiving and damn their stupid hallway handholding and their stupid faces and their stupid bangs!
(I love when people set out to reveal only a little bit and end up revealing a lot, as if telling a story is a natural impulse...It is!)
Dave
Four and ten, I could not possibly agree with you more! I guess I feel that way about slow walkers in general, but it is only made worse when they are in love.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed the part about gingers, that was really funny. I also liked the part about people who are politically/religiously overbearing, I feel the same. I like on some of the points, you could expand a little bit more to explain why you hate/dislike these things.
ReplyDeleteI think it's fairly funny to keep seeing references to spiders in these lists. They're truly evil. Some of these feel fairly personal and unique (naturally number 11 comes to mind) but I'd like to see a bit more elaboration to make some of the more common fears stand out.
ReplyDelete